There is something awfully peculiar about my tortoise, Wamu. Well it's repeatedly somehow surmounted that double fence as shown in the photo above. I've always checked the obstruction for loopholes, but apparently my tortoise can divide by zero and fly/climb/jetpack around it. There's nothing special beyond that gate either- it's just a dilapidated shed containing a ladder, lawn mower, some Christmas decorations, and the air conditioner generator thinger. It's fenced off because it's easy for a tortoise to get lost/stuck in a jumble of misc crap. (Perhaps Wamu is dating that lovely rusting green ladder off to the side, but I'd rather not speculate.) I'm thinking that Turdy here must be some sort of Japanese espionage agent; don't you agree? (Actually there is a loophole if Wamu uses brute force and pushes through the slightly bendable white fence, but then it'd be Super-turtle.)
Another revelation that I've had, is that boiled seahorse soup is absolutely putrid. As I've been telling an awesome person a moment ago, my parents have been feeding me remedies that will "surely" make me grow, in a new fit of panic over my height. As if metallic-tasting, peach-flavored Asian calcium tablets weren't enough.
Today, they cooked me a fat bowl of the "delicious" soup. One sniff and sip was enough to provoke a queasy stomach for the remnant of the day, but no- I had to eventually "drink" the entire portion. It consisted of a bitter, beige watery liquid and some chicken, but it all tasted like what fingernails would taste like if you made soup out of that. I came up with a decent strategy to ingest the delightful stuff: cram a handful of peanuts and anything else w/ a pungent flavor into my mouth, and slurp as many gulps of the soup I can through a straw. My record is 3! Unfortunately, I have to go through this chronically until I grow two inches. Hopefully I'll get used to it and not have to nom a pound of chocolate afterwards to mask the aftertaste.
(Poor seahorses. >:)
Another revelation that I've had, is that boiled seahorse soup is absolutely putrid. As I've been telling an awesome person a moment ago, my parents have been feeding me remedies that will "surely" make me grow, in a new fit of panic over my height. As if metallic-tasting, peach-flavored Asian calcium tablets weren't enough.
Today, they cooked me a fat bowl of the "delicious" soup. One sniff and sip was enough to provoke a queasy stomach for the remnant of the day, but no- I had to eventually "drink" the entire portion. It consisted of a bitter, beige watery liquid and some chicken, but it all tasted like what fingernails would taste like if you made soup out of that. I came up with a decent strategy to ingest the delightful stuff: cram a handful of peanuts and anything else w/ a pungent flavor into my mouth, and slurp as many gulps of the soup I can through a straw. My record is 3! Unfortunately, I have to go through this chronically until I grow two inches. Hopefully I'll get used to it and not have to nom a pound of chocolate afterwards to mask the aftertaste.
(Poor seahorses. >:)
5 comments:
wamu looks YUMMY. and very, very cute.
my mom feeds me chinese supplements too, like this asphalt colored/textured goop and donkey skin soup :D
My mom was complaining about how I'm not getting any taller yesterday. A week ago, she was complaining that I was getting too tall.
ASIAN PARENTS ASTOUND THE MIND.
stereotype
I think Wamu is in a relationship with both the green ladder and that black bucket off to the side. It's going to be awkward when the cleaning spray on the right finds out.
Speaking of which, have you eaten turtle soup before? Delicious stuff. Hey, I should go tell your mom that drinking turtle soup makes you grow eight inches overnight. No more turtle problem with Wamu, AMIRITE?
(Washington Mutual? Really?)
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